Daylight Savings Time

Yes! Tonight at 2:00 AM you must set your clocks ahead one hour to remain in sync with the rest of America. Most normal people will make the time change tonight, before going to bed for the night.

But why???
I have an old friend named Kevin who had a very interesting opinion on that matter. However it must be said that Kevin is an extremely different kind of person. He is a very suspicious person. He is paranoid. But he is not schizoid. He doesn't hear voices telling him to do things. He has no auditory or visual hallucinations. He just has a very deep seated distrust of humans. If you saw him in public you would not be impressed by him in any direction. But you would never see him in the same place two days in a row. He has several routes to every destination. And he never returns the same way he came. Even if it's just to pick up some bread. Just in case someone IS following him.

But inside Kevin's home is where you'll see how much effort he really puts into his personal security. His doors and windows have locks. But so does his refrigerator and pantry. Once he enters his home he balances a beer bottle upside down on the top of his door knobs so that if anyone tries to jiggle the knob, the bottle will fall to the floor. I have sworn to my friend Kevin to state nothing of what he does after the bottle falls.

He does not wear a tin foil hat. But he does believe there are people interested in reading our thoughts. And whenever Kevin turns off his television set, he unplugs the power cord also. It has nothing to do with fire safety. It is a hold over from the 60s. When TV sets had vacuum tubes. Back in those days the power supply kept some of the tubes turned on so that the TV would come on faster. Those tubes would glow and the light could be seen through the ventilation holes in the back of the set. And Kevin was sure that the TV was still on and could be used to watch him. Similar to the way a CB radio could transmit and receive. The invention of the transistor and solid state circuitry made the glowing tubes unnecessary. But 40 years later Kevin still unplugs his TV when it is not being used to receive a signal.

I had to tell you that so that I could tell you this. In 1975 Kevin told me that daylight saving time was a conspiracy by the powers behind the throne to do away with "Drive-In-Theaters." It had nothing to do with what time farmers went to bed. But those DRIVE INs were a cesspool or immorality. And they were corrupting the moral values of the American youth. I asked him how changing the time would accomplish this goal. And Kevin told me that the movies would not be able to start until it was dark enough. And in the prime of summer, the movies wouldn't be able to start until 9:00 PM or later. And by 9PM most people would have found something else to do. I laughed at Kevin's suspect theory and he reminded me of the fact that harvesters and combines have huge lighting systems and are capable of working 24-7.

I shrugged off his assessment then. But, about this time every year, from then until now, Kevin asks me; "Been to a DRIVE-IN lately?" Whatever you choose to believe about why? Be sure to set your clocks ahead tonight.